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SNAKE EYES movie review – Not for die hard G.I. Joe fans

Title: Snake Eyes
DirectorRobert Schwentke
StarringHenry Golding, Andrew Koji, Úrsula Corberó, Samara Weaving, and Iko Uwais
Movie length: 2 hours 1 minute

Snake Eyes is the latest installment in the G.I. Joe movie franchise from Paramount Studios and tells the origin story of the character including how he got his name…except it just doesn’t make sense in my opinion. How Han Solo got his name in the movie Solo makes more sense then how Snake Eyes got his name in this movie.

I should mention I saw this movie twice in D-BOX and had a great time watching it. Where it fails as a Snake Eyes movie it makes up for it for being a really fun amusement ride. Now if you’re not familiar with what D-BOX is, it’s essentially seats that jump and move with the movie so when the motorcycles rumble your seats rumble, when they turn left and right your seat moves left and right. So this movie in D-BOX is what Avatar was to 3D. As in watching Avatar in 2D is not the same experience as watching Avatar in 3D. So if you’re going to watch this movie in a theater do yourself a favor and watch it like I did, in D-BOX (if it’s available in your area that is).

When I first saw the trailer I immediately was against this movie because Snake Eyes talks and without his mask which goes against most everything fans of the cartoon saw for this character. But then I learned that it’s a prequel and it’s own story. After watching this movie I I feel like they had a pretty generic martial arts movie and they did what Hollywood does best, taking a script that wouldn’t normally work and inputting a recognizable IP in it. 

That is how I think we got this bare-bones vanilla Snake Eyes. Actually it’s not vanilla its rocky road, because the whole movie is filmed using shaky cam. Not just the action sequences somebody could be walking and for some reason a person walking a straight line is filmed in shaky cam, because I guess the director thought it would be more entertaining that way. Every action scene in this movie is filmed that way.

Photo Credit: Niko Tavernise

Throughout the whole movie I wish the cameraman would take a few feet back, or at least a few steps back. I cannot speak for everybody but I feel like we as audience members would love to see action sequences that are filmed in one take or at least look like they were filmed in one take. Not just the beginning of the fight and then the end. Oh no their is 20 ninjas how is he going to defeat them? By cutting away and coming back later. Or being to close and shake the camera to the point where you can’t make out what’s happening on screen.

The basic plot of this movie is that Snake Eyes is out for revenge and will do anything to get it. He is basically a jerk that is taken in to this clan and is treated like family. 

Spoiler territory: Instead of letting go of the past and trying to become a better human being, he betrays their trust which made me go why? I understood his motive I’m just saying he could have gotten what he wanted in a respectful manner and not the manor he did. Instead of a very unlikable guy becoming a hero and becoming a likeable guy, we have a very unlikable guy seeing the mess he created and thinking well I guess I should probably clean it up. And then gets rewarded for cleaning up the mess he created. While at the same time punishing a member of their family for trying to clean up the mess he created as well, but it was still Snake Eyes fault. So the reasoning doesn’t make sense to me. The only thing that makes sense to me is now I understand why Storm Shadow hates Snake Eyes.. End of Spoilers.

I give it a C+ for (Speed) Cycle. The movie starts with him being a very unlikable character and ends with him being a slightly less unlikable character. Overall if you’re not a fan of the G.I. Joe  franchise or you like dumb martial art movies with poorly filmed action sequences you might like this movie. This movie is not for the die hard G.I. Joe fans because it takes characters from GI Joe and does its own thing with it. But like I say with every movie give it a chance and make up your own mind.

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